Tuesday, 9 September 2014

Now That You're Gone

I received a phone call yesterday that took me seconds to digest on it. A heartbreaking news of a sudden loss of a loved one. One of my close guy friend and classmate in high school lost his mother because of a sudden heart attack. The tragic death of her mom shocked me and is still unbelievable to me. This guyfriend of mine, we haven't seen each other for 18 long years. The last time we saw each other was at our high school graduation. Even though we still studied college in the same city, we had our respective circle of friends in our college years and time didn't permit us to meet once in a while. Two years after graduating from college, he flew to United Kingdom and worked there as a nurse. Even though for that span of time he comes home for a vacation here but I don't know why we could not meet. Thankfully, through the efforts of one of our classmate, we were able to meet just last week. It was a Thursday. It feels like nothing has changed and it feels good to be reunited.

His name is Jon. He's an only child. He lost his father a couple of years ago. I got to catch up with him during our meeting: his life alone in England. It's good to know how he has become a responsible son and a family to his relatives. I so admire him with all the accomplishments he had made for himself and for his relatives. Such a genuine heart at that. He always want to give the best for his mother. He said the only family he has right now is his mom. I felt a bit of guilt because I asked him a question pertaining to her long term plans whether to stay in UK for good or settle here. If not for his mom, there's no reason for him to get back here, he said. Maybe for a vacation just to reminisce the country where he grew up from. Then I shoot a question, what if your mom will be gone? Then he just shrugged. Then 3 days after that meeting, that question became a reality. I should have not asked that. Parang 'usog'? I felt weird and sorry.

It dawned to me again that in whatever way, God has its way of ending our lives in the right time and place. Who would have thought about dying when at that moment you are on for a great vacation with your mother? All plans are ready to be fulfilled. You are already in the pre-departure area ready to board the plane who'd bring you to your destination. You know your mom is in good shape and fit to do fun-filled activities. And then all of a sudden, it comes to a full stop. With Jon's mom, the unusual more than a month vacation that he spent here in the Philippines that should have been the usual 3-week vacation only gave more time of him and his mom to bond and be together. But it's such a bitter ending. Seeing your loved one pass away in your own eyes and feeling the pain she is undergoing, those seconds are like hours full of agony and hell. You wish that that moment will finally end and can easily be mended. You wish that everything will be okay but damn not. 

Right now, I just want to hug my friend really tight. I know he is not okay. I wish him to be but I know how it feels to have lost a loved one. I wish that hug could take away a bit of pain he is now feeling. But I know it is not too soon. I worry about him a lot. I feel so sorry for his loss. To you my friend Jon, I really wish you well and peace. I know it's hard because your mom is in good condition. You wouldn't expect that this all happen in a flash. But it happened. I pray for strength, for hope and comfort in this trying times. Just keep in mind and heart that God has reasons and that we should trust on that purpose for what happened. Cheng said, everything is in perfect timing. I guess it is. 

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